"Oh My Gosh!" Moment

I just read one of my old posts entitled "When You Say You Love Me", and oh my gosh! I can't believe I said those things. They were so... passionate. I never realized that I really loved him (HeartKeeper) that much. My eyes became WIDE. I... I... Oh my gosh! I'm speechless!!!

If you, whoever you are, haven't read that post yet, then READ IT!!! Don't read the song. Read the love letter under the song lyrics. I just can't believe I said those things.



You know, I've fallen in love only twice, and I've realized something... Want to know what it is? Well, I become inspired to write the things that I post here on my blog mostly because of love. My specialty when I was still in love with HeartKeeper was writing love LETTERS. But now, as I am learning to love my Angel, I'm inspired to write POEMS. I guess, the test I took was right. I was meant to take up literature as my college course.


Well, just wanted to post something. Nothing special about this post. Haha.

Who is HeartKeeper?

To my dear readers,

You might ask me who HeartKeeper is. Well, I've decided to reveal to all of you what his real name is and what he WAS in my life.

HeartKeeper... His real name is John Paul A. Galsim, and he's my ex-boyfriend. My parents never knew about us, and I'm hoping that they never will. If they did, I don't think that they'd ever trust me again. Okay, so maybe it's fine if they find out. But not now. Maybe after 10 years or so. Oh, yeah, that'll be a great time for them to find out, because I'd already be an adult then. JUST NOT NOW!!!

So here are a few things that I have been dying to say ever since we broke up:

1) I thought John Paul was a nice guy, at first, but as the time passed he became more and more contentious! That made me start conversations that were very macabre. I mean, he made me so sad that I kept thinking 'bout commiting suicide!

2) I really loved him. :( But now I don't! :D

3) He promised me that he'd teach me how to play the guitar! But I guess that promise was made to be broken (like all of his other promises).

4) He told me that he loved me, but I learned that when we were in the 4th month of our relationship he already wanted to break up with me... and we reached 6 months!

5) I can't believe I'm actually saying this, but he is a bit of a voyeur!!!!!!! (To those of you who don't know what that means, please, don't ask me.)


Woo! It's really nice to express feelings that you've been keeping for soooooo long. Well, thanks for reading this post. :)


P.S. About 'my angel', we're not together and we are not dating. And no, I won't tell you who he is yet. :)

I'm Sorry

I'm sorry for everything that I did wrong,
For turning this into a very sad song.

I'm sorry for not being the person you wanted me to be.
But I just can't change who I am, you see.

I'm sorry for almost ruining your life,
For having you go through this terrible strife.

I'm sorry for sometimes being untrue.
I'm sorry for not being the right person for you.

I wrote this when my angel and I had a very terrible misunderstanding. I don't know why, but he really inspires me to write these poems. He's a bigger inspiration for me than you-know-who. And frankly, my feelings for my angel are deeper than the ones I felt when I was still in love with h-i-m.

My Bane

A short poem I wrote when I was sad because our English teacher was mad at us. This was original written to be separate poems (stanza 1, and stanza 2 & 3). I dedicate this to you Mr. Winter.

I wake up at dawn from terrible dreams
That were caused by what has been happening, it seems.
Though I try to shed some light so that I may understand,
My knowledge is a thin as a single hair strand.

Tears are now meaningless.
My life becomes worthless.
I have truly gone insane,
And I know that sadness will be my bane.

I sing a lament for a dying heart,
Which makes it's death turn into a sad musical art.

Patience

For you, Mr. Winter.

There are just some things that we may never understand.
But we all must give each other a hand.
We have to face this world with our spirits high.
And it's really okay to come out with a sigh.
Patience...

Though, day by day, our hearts get heavier,
We must keep our hopes and faith together.
And if our minds would tell us "no",
Our hearts would help us get through the sorrow.
Patience...

We have no knowledge of what might become of us.
But we must not give it too much of a fuss.
And now, all we have to do is wait,
Wait for our unknown and mysterious fate.
Patience...

Never Shall I Feel This Way Again

A Prose-Poem for my angel.

Oh, what have you done to this fragile heart,
which swore to never love again?
For, once again, I see the light
That had freed me from that dark abyss.

You tell me things that are hard to believe,
Especially the ones about how you feel.
But even though I took an oath
My heart still opened when you knocked.

You brought back my faith in God,
The faith that was already fading.
You helped me realize what life is about,
and that it's really worth living.

My dreams were washed away by my tears,
and these tears made me think that it was better to die.
But you lent me your strength when I had none,
And you gave me hope to once again see the sun.

They say that whenever you fall in love,
It's never the same as the ones you felt before.
That's why I want you to know
That I'll never feel this way again.

You, my angel, as I call you,
Have said that you've only inflicted pain upon me,
But 'tis after we have gotten hurt
That we gain the strength to go on.

My love for you, your love for me,
I don't know how long 'twill last.
But you have shown me affection greater
Than the ones that came before.

Oh, my dear one,
You'll forever remain in my heart.
For I can never forget the person
Who made me believe in the beings from above.

These words that I have to say,
I have told you many times before,
But I will say them again.
I love you.

I shall now end this with a sigh,
And with no trepidations at all.

Some Rhymes

Ha ha! Here are some rhymes that I wrote for my angel a few nights ago. I just thought that I should post them here.

-Sweet and Neat-
Sugar is sweet.
Candy is neat.
But you're sweeter
And neater,
And have made made my life complete.


-No Fun-
Life wouldn't be fun without you around.
It would be empty without a single sound.


-Wingless Angel-
I'm in love with an angel that has no wings,
And I'd gladly choose him above all other things.


I know, I know! Ha ha! It's a bit cheesy, but hey, I think I have fallen in love with my angel.

-Isabelle